Even when people piss me off and do mean or shady things I’ll barely respond
But I once taught a class full of guys
All cis hetero that challenged every word I said
Smirked when I tried to give feedback and instructions
They banded together in their disrespect
Then they were all absent going to the protests to stop the genocide in Gaza
One wrote, I encourage you to bring our colleagues during this historic moment
Pamela Sneed
Pamela Sneed is a poet, writer, visual artist, and spoken word & musical performer (Big Mama Thornton). She is the author of Funeral Diva (2020), Imagine Being More Afraid of Freedom than Slavery (1998) and many more. She is a painter, a political artist, and an assemblage and collage artist. Teaching: She teaches online for the low-residency MFA program at the School of the Art Institute of Chicago and is a visiting artist in the summer MFA program. She is an adjunct assistant professor at the Columbia University School of the Arts.
From the publisher: Calling Down the Sky is a poetry collection that describes deep personal experiences and post-generational effects of the Canadian Aboriginal Residential School confinements in the 1960’s when thousands of First Nations, Métis, and Inuit children were placed in these schools against their parents’ wishes.
Many were forbidden to speak their language and practice their own culture. Rosanna Deerchild exposes how the Residential Schools systematically undermined Aboriginal culture across Canada and disrupted families for generations, severing the ties through which Aboriginal culture is taught and sustained, and contributing to a general loss of language and culture.
The devastating effects of the residential schools are far-reaching and continue to have significant impact on Aboriginal communities.
rosanna deerchild, calling down the sky
people ask me all the time about residential schools as if it’s their business or something
ever since that white guy nete in ottawa said he was sorry
as if he knows anything about those places
he wasn’t there he doesn’t know
he wasn’t there when i needed comfort when i cried
he doesn’t know what that priest did what those nuns did
you can’t say sorry for those things for what happened there
he’s got no right
share your story he says what does that even mean
boy these misti-gu-su and their fancy talk
share your story as if it’s that easy
anyway it was a long time ago
fifty years since those days fifty years i said nothing
the words they get caught right here in my throat
where the nuns would grab when we spoke Cree
as if grabbing a dead duck’s neck haul us up in front of that class
stand there so long, we pissed ourselves
you learn pretty quickly to stay quiet after that boy
no we never talk about it
not back home not with each other not even when it was happening,
you just tried to forget about it leave it behind
some of us did some of us are still trying
it always finds you though drags you back
don’t make up stories that’s what they told us kids
when we went back home told them what was going on in those schools
still got sent back every year less of us came home
still they said nothing until we were nothing just empty skins
full of broken english ruler broken bones bible broken spirits
and back home became a broken dream
no damage done for all but five years
that’s what it said in the letter about my residential school story
dear claimant no records no proof
sorry
nine years that’s how long they kept me in there
i was just a baby when they came for me
father died on the trapline mother in the tb sanatorium
didn’t even get to say goodbye never saw them again
nine years you know what i got for that
deaf in one ear blind in one eye
scars all over my head my legs don’t work arthritis
diabetes from what we ate there you know i never once saw fruit
can’t get no damn sleep the dead keep me awake eh ask me for forgiveness
but you can’t forgive and forget the unnameable
there is no word for what they did in our language
to speak it is to become torn from the choking
money got no cure for that
now i’m almost seventy
and you want me to share my story
ok then here it is here in the unwritten here in the broken lines of my body that can never forget